It's over!  And with mixed feelings - the good kind of mixed feelings, where you really liked it but are sad it's all done.

I remember one of my friends talking about reading this book right after it came out, and she said she was disappointed because it wasn't as "conclusive" as she wanted it to be.  Now that I've read it I'm not sure what she meant.  Mebbe she just doesn't read dystopian science fiction, because um this one ends how pretty much they ALL end.  On the bittersweet-but-hopeful side, leaving a lot of the future to your imagination.  Sure there are a couple things in it that I wouldn't have done, one in particular that bothered me the most (if you've read it I'm sure you know what I mean), but the more I think about it, I guess that's the point.  And the fact that it bothered me has kept me thinking about it for a long time after shutting the book last night, so that's probably a good thing too.  The more I think about it, the more I'm okay with it - because it causes some stuff that needed to happen that maybe wouldn't have happened otherwise, now that I think it over.  And you know, that's the sign of a good book - that when it's all done, you keep thinking about it and discovering the way it all fit together.

One thing the author did that caught me off-guard - when people were assumed dead, some of them were actually dead.  I mean, in books like these, if you don't see a bloody body, that person is going to pop up again later and surprise everyone for a final boss battle/tearful reunion (depending on whether they were friend or foe).  There was one character that was assumed to have been tortured and killed in the Capitol, and I was positive he was going to pop up later.  But he didn't.  He was actually gone.  Which was sad because I liked him, but I was also impressed that she didn't use the ol' favorite of "Surprise!  Here I am!  I survived in the following implausible way and am here to help you now!"  So I had some really mixed feelings there.  Because I really liked him.  :(  Just in case you're wondering, two of my three favorite characters died in this series.  ;_;  Sad for me.  But the other one made it through, so I'm glad for that.  Because a lot of people died here and I'm really just lucky all three of them didn't kick the bucket.

Lastly - I am excited for the first movie to come out, but I am even MORE excited for the second movie to come out, because FINNICK.  I need to decide who I want to play the world's greatest dreamboat.  :D  I can't think of anyone yet but I will find him.  The actors I find most attractive, I'm not sure they would be good Finnicks.  This will take some careful thought.

Oh wait, that wasn't lastly, THIS is lastly - when I watched the trailer I was a little saddened at how little the guy playing Peeta looked like my version of Peeta.  But I just saw a screencap of him with his hair slicked back when they're all styled for that parade thing, and I was like, Oh hey wait, there he is.  :D

Total book count:  8/75 - 10.7%
Total page count:  2477/22500 - 11.1%

Up next:  I am like 20 pages from finishing both Little Women and the autumn issue of Shelter of Daylight.  I will do one of those things tonight?  Then I am thinking about Berserker Man, or A Day No Pigs Would Die maybe.

Finally got that 15th visit in - only took a month and a half.  >.>  It's hard to get up early and go, especially when it's dark and cold outside, but I never regret it (even today, when I felt awful and am still at home because I didn't get any sleep).

It's not like I typically get any huge, spiritual revelations at the temple, but it's my...down time, I guess.  Down time I don't give myself otherwise.  When I'm there, I'm not thinking of anything else but being there.  I'm not thinking about work or writing or running or dating or what I'm going to do that day or week or month or year.  I'm in a warm, white, quiet place, full of kind and quiet people, and I can just...take shelter for a while.  Usually I don't realize how much strain I'm under from all of the above things, until I get there and leave it at the door.  Then I can take a deep breath, sit down for a minute, and feel nice and calm, and acknowledge that even if my life doesn't go the way I originally planned (which it hasn't up to the this point, so why would I expect it to now?) it's all going to be just fine.

And now it's time for a brief nap, and to work this afternoon!

Went to the gym today, to use the elliptical, because my mom was all like "that will be good because it's low-impact but still intense."  I only lasted 20 minutes...when I got off the machine my feet were numb. :/  Then for five minutes they were burning as they woke up, not that little tickly wake-up feeling, but the burning, pin-stabbing kind.  It was hard to drive home.  I had to sit on the couch and wait for a little wave of nausea to pass.  Then I had to lie on my bed for a little while after my shower and let my feeties rest.

So, it looks like my feet are still not ready for this.  Nor my stomach?  I probably went too fast on it; I've been feeling so fat and lazy during my recovery time so I really pushed myself so I could feel like I was doing something.  Probably a bad idea, that's what made me feel a little sick I bet.  And my feet just aren't ready for any extended periods of standing.  I did walk to the store last week and back, and I felt okay - it was about a mile and a half.  But the elliptical just didn't work right.  So I guess short, slow walks it is.  And I could probably do a stationary bike, since that wouldn't have as much pressure on the bottoms of my feet.

Mostly I think I need to remember that I did 40 miles almost completely unprepared, and it hasn't even been 3 weeks yet.  Just because I'm not sore all the time anymore doesn't mean I'm ready to kick it up a notch.

Also the gym by my house is so hot.  The air in there was thick and muggy and sweaty.  It's like they just shut the A/C off, because it's winter.  But come on, people are working out in there - at least turn it on low and get some air circulating.  :(  I was so sweaty when I finished, and I wasn't going that hard.  It was just so stifling and miserable I wouldn't be able to last much longer in there anyway.  I wish it weren't winter anymore if the gym can't even make itself pleasant.

Oh hey guys, look at this post over in the Wicked East Press forums!

Just in case you are wondering, this is a big deal because it is the FIRST official announcement (besides my own) of a story of mine being included in something.  I'm not just making this stuff up!  :D

Oh look, it only took me over a year to read the book my sister-in-law loaned me!  And it was really good too, not like one of those crap books that people loan you and you have to read and pretend to like to protect their feelings - it was legitimately fabulous.  And yet here we are a year later.

I was loaned this book before it was being made into a movie, before it was like A Huge Deal.  Then when it exploded all over I thought, oh, it's one of those generic anti-racism/sexism books.  Which may be why I put it off so long.  But it's not, actually.  I mean, that's what it's about, but it's not generic and it seemed a lot less stereotyped than most books of this nature.  It's set in Jackson, Mississippi, in the 1960's, while the whole nation is working on desegregation and the deep South is dead set against it.  Three women - two black, one white - decide to do something drastic to see if things can change.

The aspect of black maids working for white ladies is something I hadn't read before (though it's not like I've read extensively on this) and it was nice to read a book about racism that wasn't just...well, at the risk of sounding like a terrible person, the same repetitive thing over and over again.  Obviously I knew that even though they weren't slaves anymore, life sucked for black people in the South for a long time afterwards, and I knew a lot of the women worked as maids for white families, but that's kind of the extent.  The fear they lived in, though - that was new.  That if they slip up, "their white lady" could fire them and spread the rumor that their maid was a thief, and they wouldn't be able to find work and their kids would starve.  And like Minny says about halfway through, she doesn't really care about being able to vote, or being able to eat at a restaurant with white people - what she cares about is if ten years in the future, will some white lady call Minny's daughters dirty and call them thieves?

I guess one thing I really liked about it was that the characters were believable.  There were kind white people and cruel white people.  And the black women weren't all sage wisdom and loving kindness to all mankind white the white folks were mean and petty and cruel, the way I think they're portrayed a lot.  A lot of them hated white people, with good reason, and none of them were willing to trust a white person, also with good reason.  Again, it's hard to figure out how to phrase this without sounding terrible, but I admired that the black characters were just as flawed.  It was even more equality, right there on the page.  Y'know?  Okay, so now I gotta see the movie.  I think an actress I already like a lot plays Minny, and I need to see that!

Total book count:  6/75 - 8.0%
Total page count:  1952/22500 - 8.7%

Up next:  Probably been long enough that I can start Mockingjay.  :3

Just submitted "Naked Rachel" to Andromeda Spaceways Inflight Magazine!  :D  (I love that name.  I want to be in it just to say I'm in such a thing.)  Should that be in italics?  Magazine titles are probably italics, same as books, right?

I didn't want to try to edit it down to less than 5k for Bards & Sages Quarterly; I cut out 300 words but I read through it several times and couldn't find any way to trim it again without losing something important.  Also, in the issue of B&SQ I read, almost all of their stories were really short.  I get the feeling they prefer short stories and lots of 'em, whereas the issue of Shelter of Daylight I'm reading has far fewer stories and most of them are pretty lengthy.  So I decided, even if I got it down to right-on 5k, it still may not have much of a chance in a publication that seems to prefer shorter ones.

So, I looked over the markets I'd saved on Duotrope, and remembered Andromeda Spaceways, which markets itself as a place for more light-hearted and humorous science fiction, since many sci fi magazines these days are all hard and edgy and gritty.  Perfect place for "Naked Rachel," maybe!  They also accept up to 10k, so I was totally set there.

The only thing is that on Duotrope the stats say they only accept about 2% of submissions they receive.  So that's a little scary!  The only other market I've been accepted to that has such stats is Shelter of Daylight, who accepts between 15-20% of submissions.  Yikes.  (The other ones are books, not magazines, and had one set submission period, so those stats don't really mean anything.)

Oh well, we'll see what happens!  If Andromeda Spaceways doesn't like it, I can always give it a shot at B&SQ anyway.

Wow!  Found this in an article on MSN about the "laziest" ways to lose weight.

"Sleeping may possibly be the laziest way to lose weight ever. During a 6-year study, Canadian researchers observed the connection between sleep patterns and obesity and found that people who slept 5 to 6 hours a night gained 4.5 pounds more than those who dozed for 7 to 8 hours nightly. While many studies suggest that sleep deprivation increases levels of the hunger hormone ghrelin, a recent study in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition determined that lack of sleep can also slow the rate at which calories are burned. Swedish researchers found that even a single night of skimping on sleep slows metabolism the next morning and reduces the number of calories burned while performing automatic tasks, like breathing and digesting food, by 5 to 20%, compared with the morning after a good night’s rest."

I always felt weird that people can get by on 5 hours of sleep every night, yet I simply could NOT function with less than 7-8 for more than one night - to be honest, on a regular night I get almost 9 I think.  I'm pretty much never willing to sacrifice my sleep for anything - when I start nodding off, I go to bed, regardless of having a paper due, having a final in the morning, or having 30 pages left in my book (even when I'm really loving it).  Maybe this is why I stay in better shape than I think I do?  (Like being able to finish the Goofy with two months of hardly training beforehand?  And even at the very end, I was never so tired I just couldn't do my running interval - pretty crazy.)  Anyway, food for thought!  And it's nice to be able to justify how much sleep I get; sometimes I feel like maybe there is something wrong with me for sleeping so much, but it looks like it's pretty healthy!

Now if I could just stop being so hungry all the time.... >.>;;

I went to the PG bank today, and Bank Teller Brett was there, but he was doing the drive-through and didn't turn around and see me.  I should've said something, but I didn't.  I finished making my deposit and left.  Oh well.  :(

And it's a shame, because I looked cute today, too.  :P  I guess if I wanted I can go tomorrow...no restrictions on going two days in a row if he didn't even see me today.  Yesterday I was at the Orem branch, and one of the other tellers commented on Connie's note and asked if anything had come of it yet.  I said I hadn't heard anything, and I didn't want to ask her every day and look crazy.  :P  But I ended up there talking to all the tellers for like 20 minutes, because they weren't very busy, and we had a good time being BFFs.  Also apparently they all agree with Connie that Brett should ask me out.  So, um, there's that, anyway.

I did tell them that I was all for it, because with Brett I would at LEAST know it would be an enjoyable evening.  My blind dates haven't been working out and I tend to view them with a looming sense of dread, so if Brett asked me out I would be like "YESSSS" because I wouldn't have to worry about it being awkward or lame.

I probably will need to go to the bank and see him anyway, because we are friends on Facebook now (and I told him it was so I didn't have to go to PG to work out when he and my bro can meet up) but he doesn't seem to be on much, so it takes days for him to respond to anything.  I just want to get him and Eric together to talk Tagalog at each other, dangit.  Why is this so hard?

I am working hard on not just throwing my hands up and saying "screw it" like I am tempted to do in all matters regarding boys lately.  I definitely would have by this point if it weren't for the Tagalog thing.  I know Brett wants someone to practice the language with and it's a nice, casual thing anyway.  So I need to get these two to meet each other and THEN I can say "screw it" and stop trying to do anything or get anywhere and focus on real life again.  -_-

I stayed up late to finish this (well, not that late) and I've discovered that how tired I am when I wake up has a big effect on how cold my apartment feels.  :(  I'm freezing and I want to go back to bed.  (Also my legs hurt)

I just looked her up and Mary Jane Clark is related to Mary Higgins Clark (who I know writes books with her daughter, Carol Higgins Clark).  Wikipedia says Higgins Clark is her "former mother-in-law," so I guess this Mary married the older Mary's son (Ahahaha that is so fun to say out loud) but they are not married anymore.  I guess?  Anyway!

This book had the same flavor as a Mary Higgins Clark book, what with it being a mystery with a female protagonist, but I found it more...continuously suspenseful.  This one was hard to put down because things kept happening, and you could always tell a big revelation was just around the corner.  The main character, Diane, is a newswoman who has been sent to a tiny beach town to interview a girl for a news segment on "girls who cry wolf," or disappear and fake their own abductions for attention.  This girl went missing, and was found alive with tales of being held against her will for three frightening days.  The cops don't believe her because she's a troubled girl, known to have been in therapy for years and always doing things to get attention.  But while Diane is in town trying to get an interview, another girl goes missing - and suddenly what the first girl has to say becomes very important.

I didn't figure out who did it until the very end (though they were on my list of suspects - but when you have three or four maybes, that doesn't count as figuring it out :P).  It was pretty intense.  I stayed up late to finish it and then had a little trouble sleeping.  ._.

Total book count:  5/75 - 6.7%
Total page count:  1501/22500 - 6.7%

Up next:  Wow, they match!  SWEET.  Still working on Little Women, and I think I'm going to start The Help, because I just found it, and it is Heather's copy and I have had it for like a year, and I am going to give it back soon.